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Did Covid affect your Solo sex quality
Well, what can I say. It seems we are alike in many things! And I believe that the results of this poll / interactive experience / analysis will show that many people also feel this way, which tells you immediately something very important: you’re not alone, you’re not broken, this is all as normal as it sucks.
I am not a psychologist and my lectures on psychology are old and outdated, but I think that the massive trauma that covid brought with itself, extends also to areas of our Ego and the relationship we have with pleasure. Personally, I’ve found that I’ve moved from shooting at least one or two loads a day (where in the good moments I would get to even 4/5, when really horny), to maybe one or two a week now.
But what happened? I still look at the same images online, and I still put in my favorites and put my likes to the same things that I’ve always liked… and yet. I don’t feel connected, I don’t feel as present and in the moment, and I don’t feel my cock responding. Of course, I might decide to “take the matter in my own hands” and sure, I get hard and I’ll shoot my load. And that’s that.
Instead, before covid 19, I used to at least once a week have these long jerking off sessions where I’d make of it almost a spiritual experience, as it should be; an actual session of cock worship. I was fueled up with passion, with lust, and I loved edging. Now I’m still the same man, I still like the same things… but fuck, why does it all feel so distant and far away from my core?
I believe the answer once again relies on the internalized and not at all processed (and ongoing) trauma; I also believe there is a part of me that feels that it would be “wrong” to enjoy sex like before right now. Because I am alive.
I am not sure if this is a sort of sense of guilt from seeing all of those people die, or if it’s because I feel that since I got lucky (and also I was very very careful) I should now only focus on survival, as said. But I do know that I don’t relate to pleasure like something always available and to look for. Pleasure like it was before, just like hope in the future like it was before, just seem to be something out of reach at the moment.
And maybe I behave this way because when I do indulge in pleasure, I find myself disappointed and worried, because again of the Emotional Blockage.
Did you also feel this way? What about your use of pornography? Is it something that maybe come from social media itself? Is it the “social” part of it?
If you feel inclined to pursue this stream of thoughts, please click here to proceed to “Pornography and social media” by clicking on “I agree”.
If you don’t, then try moving to the next stage clicking on “I disagree”.